UE 1998 Section C Proofreading (Q77- 95)

No.

Ill formed Sentences

Correction

Analysis

77.

From 9:30 to 11:00 at SaturdayˇK

From 9:30 to 11:00 on SaturdayˇK

The preposition, ˇ§onˇ¨ is used in front of day and date.

Day: on Sunday

Date: on Nov. 9th

But the preposition, ˇ§atˇ¨ is used in front of an exact time.

e.g. We met at 1:00 p.m.

78.

Fun Club members invited to come along to the ParkˇK

Fun Club members are invited to come along to the ParkˇK

Here, passive voice is used because the fun club members have received the invitation and go to the Ocean Park.

Passive Voice:  verb to be  +  past participle

               are           invited

79.

ˇKto gain a best understanding of sharksˇK

ˇKto gain a better understanding of sharksˇK

Here, ˇ§bestˇ¨, the superlative form should not be used.  Instead, ˇ§betterˇ¨ should be used in order to compare the membersˇ¦ understanding of sharks before and after attending the workshops.

80.

ˇK a better understanding of sharkˇK

ˇK a better understanding of sharks

Since there are many sharks in the Park, ˇ§sharksˇ¨ should be in plural form.

81.

Workshops, exhibits and tours that will explain the biology of sharksˇK

Workshops, exhibits and tours will explain the biology of sharksˇK

ˇ§thatˇ¨ should be deleted.

The structure of this sentence:

Subject             +  verb       +   object

Workshops, exhibits     will explain     the biology

and tours                             of sharks

84.

the enclose application formˇK

the enclosed application formˇK

The verb, ˇ§encloseˇ¨ should be replaced by the past participle which is acted as an adjective, ˇ§enclosedˇ¨.  ˇ§enclosedˇ¨ is used to modify the noun phrase, ˇ§application formˇ¨

85.

Fun Club members which are fond of gardening will have a special treatˇK

Fun Club members who are fond of gardening will have a special treatˇK

The relative pronoun, ˇ§whichˇ¨ should be replaced by ˇ§whoˇ¨ because the relative clause which is used to give additional information about people begins with ˇ§whoˇ¨.

86.

Fun Club members who are fond of gardening will have a special treat come on August 10thˇK

Fun Club members who are fond of gardening will have a special treat coming on August 10thˇK

ˇ§comeˇ¨ should be changed into ˇ§comingˇ¨ to form a present participle ,act as an adjective.  ˇ§coming on August 10thˇ¨ is an adjective phrase used to modify the noun phrase ˇ§a special treatˇ¨.

Subject            +   Verb    +        Object

Fun Club members     will have        a special treat

who are fond                         coming on

of gardening                           August 10th 

87.

ˇK with two special workshop sessions in 9.00 and 11.00ˇK

ˇK with two special workshop sessions at/ between 9.00 and 11.00ˇK

ˇ§inˇ¨ should be replaced by ˇ§atˇ¨ or ˇ§betweenˇ¨.

a)      ˇ§at 9.00 and 11.00ˇ¨ means that one session is at 9.00 and another one is at 11.00..

b)      ˇ§between 9.00 and 11.00ˇ¨ means that the exact time is not mentioned.  What we know is that two sessions will be held in the 2- hour period, between 9.00 and 11.00.

88.

Ocean Parkˇ¦s gardening team will offer it special growing tipsˇK

Ocean Parkˇ¦s gardening team will offer them special growing tipsˇK

ˇ§itˇ¨ should be replaced by the object pronoun, ˇ§themˇ¨.  ˇ§themˇ¨ is used to refer to the Fun Club members.

89.

All child under 12 must be accompanied by an adultˇK

All children under 12 should be accompanied by an adultˇK

The determiner, ˇ§Allˇ¨ should be followed by a plural noun, ˇ§childrenˇ¨ because ˇ§allˇ¨ indicates that the number of children is more than one.

90.

ˇK either of this programmesˇK

ˇK either of these programmesˇK

ˇ§thisˇ¨ should be changed to ˇ§theseˇ¨ because the noun, ˇ§programmesˇ¨ is in plural form. The plural form of the determine, ˇ§thisˇ¨ is ˇ§theseˇ¨.

91.

Entry fees for adults and children are sameˇK

Entry fees for adults and children are

the sameˇK

ˇ§the sameˇ¨ is a usage .

92.

ˇKwill be admitted freely of chargeˇK

ˇKwill be admitted free of chargeˇK

ˇ§freeˇ¨ is an adjective .

93.

Participants must fill out separate application forms by each programme.

Participants must fill out separate application forms for each programme.

ˇ§byˇ¨ should be replaced by ˇ§forˇ¨ The preposition, ˇ§byˇ¨ is used to indicate the agent or means of doing sth. But the preposition ˇ§forˇ¨ means ˇ§for the purpose of (sth)ˇ¨

94.

If the number of entries do exceeds the maximumˇK

If the number of entries do exceed the maximumˇK

ˇ§doˇ¨ is an auxiliary verb used to emphasize that a verb is positive. ˇ§exceedˇ¨ is in its base form after ˇ§doˇ¨.

95.

ˇKparticipants will selected by lucky draw.

ˇKparticipants will be selected by lucky draw.

Passive voice should be used here.

Passive voice: correct form of be + past participle

             will be           selected